When Someone is Too Busy For You

“No one is ever that busy, it just depends where you sit on their priority list.” (Taken from a friend’s Facebook post.)

This can be a hurtful realisation. When you place people that you love on your priority list, you naturally assume that you are just as valuable to them. The truth is, it is not always the case, and there is also a deeper lesson that is presenting itself to you.

Sometimes you have to realise that you will always love more than the other person, that you will care more deeply and that you are the one that keeps the relationship alive. More importantly though, you have to realise their lack of communication and busyness is not a measure of your self worth. It is because of your big heart and ability to love that kept the relationship going, but if you accept that type of relationship, eventually it will affect your self worth and hurt your heart. It’s about giving and receiving. 

You can’t keep pouring from your cup without having it replenished, and the only way to truly keep your cup full is to love yourself first. Looking for love, peace, joy or fulfillment outside of yourself will eventually lead to the very opposite. 

This message finally began to really sink in for myself. There is nothing in the external world that will give me everlasting joy. There are things and people that can give the experience of happiness but that is all. It is just an experience. It is not a way of being. To expect peace, joy and love to come from outside of us is unrealistic, because at any given moment the source of our perceived happiness and peace can be taken from us. It is and always will be beyond our control. The only thing ever in our control is our inner world. We can choose how we react to situations. We can choose to be hurt, or we can choose to accept that the other person’s behaviour is nothing more than a reflection of their inner world, not ours! Cultivating our inner garden will bring us the peace, joy and love we seek. Once these things are blossoming within then we will see them without as well, and if the outer does change, our inner garden will be so abundant that the changes in the outer will not matter. Then we will finally have peace, joy and love; and the lack of you being on someone else’s priority list will no longer matter because you have made yourself a priority. Your cup is now being filled by the eternal source that lives inside of you.

Love yourself first and then you will be able to have healthy boundaries and give love to others without hurting yourself. If you are not on someone’s priority list it is because you are not on your priority list either. We are mirrors for one another and hence what causes us to feel hurt is a reflection of what is lacking within us. We can keep blaming others for the way they treat us or don’t treat us, but ultimately it comes down to how we treat ourselves. Go and make love to yourself! Woo yourself. Court your own heart with gifts, love notes, affirmations, baths or even take yourself away for the weekend. Dance with yourself! If you can’t find true fulfillment with your own company then the way other people treat you will always keep you on an emotional roller coaster. It’s not an easy thing to achieve. Creating a beautiful garden takes a lot of hard work. There’s a lot of digging, weeding, planting and nurturing that needs to go into it. Our inner garden needs exactly the same thing. 

I do want to add at the end here, you are never alone though. At times you will feel alone, and you will feel abandoned. You will feel that you are unsupported or unheard. You will feel unloved. You will feel unimportant. These are all a part of our human feelings and experience. I know them well. I have felt all of them throughout my life at different times and at differing depths. However, all of these feelings were for me to grow, and to become emotionally and spiritually stronger, and this morning I had a realisation. I am not alone. I have never been alone. I am loved. I have never been unloved. I was gifted an omen, or a piece of my puzzle a few nights ago in a dream. It directly triggered a childhood memory as well. It made me realise how a story from childhood would play out now 44 odd years later. There was so much amazing synchronicity and wisdom gifted to me through this dream that I was absolutely speechless. One thing it did hi-light to me, is that Spirit and my spiritual helpers have been with me my whole life.

While in this world some people may be too “busy” to maintain a relationship, or too busy to even just send a hello, there is a rich and loving invisible world that is ALWAYS there for us. The spirit world. However that looks for you, there is a spirit world that is never too busy for you. No matter the billions of souls on this earth, the spirit world always talks to us. It always tries to send us love. It will always try to show you that you are loved and that you are important. Do you want to know how important and special you are? You have been birthed through the womb onto this earth. Incredible in itself, but it also means you have come from the cosmic womb that creates and births everything! I think that’s pretty special, don’t you?

The spirit world will try to show you that you do matter, despite what you think. This happens to me all the time. I am constantly receiving little gifts from Spirit and my spirit guides. Some of these gifts are feathers in bizarre places, gold coins, love hearts in all sorts of forms and even rainbows inside of my house! Spirit has never been too busy to ignore or forget about me, but sometimes I have been guilty of ignoring Spirit. Sometimes I have made other things my priority and not Spirit! However, Spirit and my spirit guides still send me love. Unconditionally. 

We can do the same for those that don’t put us on their priority list. It just means we place our priorities to what does nourish us, and that is feeding our souls first. And…spending devotional time with Spirit and our spirit guides, because they are always there for us. You just need to start looking for the rose petals, the omens left by the spirit world, and they will guide you home to you. Spirit loves you always and unconditionally. Spirit always has time for you.

Much love,

Zera 🌹